Kom-Bucha-Bucha

On my search for the fountain of youth, I stumbled upon Kombucha. It is commonly referred to as an elixir. Kombucha is a food supplement prepared from a symbiotic colony of yeast and bacteria that is added to tea for its alleged health benefits. Basically it a mushroom soaked in tea. Appealing right?

Now, I am not a fan of mushrooms or tea, but maybe when the two come together the lights will dim and the soft melodic voice of Marvin Gaye singing “Let’s Get It On” will penetrate the mixture. It can’t be all bad, right? I know someone who is a dedicated kombucha drinker and swears by its health advantages. I value this person’s opinion, so I am willing to test this drink. Here goes nothing.

(Apparently it is all about the pomegranate flavor, but I could not find that one so we will be evaluating Gingerberry.)

Alright so my day is almost complete. Here is my experience with Gingerberry Kombucha.

I awoke at 8:00 AM and consumed half of my kombucha drink. It was surprisingly tasty. It has a vinegar odor and taste to it, but it just reminded me of Easter and sunburns. The flavor is similar to that of a weak white wine. I read stories that people often felt a little buzz from the product. I did not receive that kick. My kombucha is the Enlightened variety. I think I need to bump it up and get the 21+ version because I am missing out.

When I left to work at 9:00 AM I felt a little energy serge, but I believe I fell victim to the placebo effect. Nonetheless my stomach did not begin its morning growling ritual at 11:00 AM, which was a definite plus. I had lunch at 12:30 PM and I devoured the second half of the kombucha. I was a little hesitant to drink the bottom portion because that is where the “culture” is found. I’ll hate all day on this culture. It’s the chunky stuff at the bottom of the kombucha. I set aside my hesitancy and drank the rest. The second half of my workday went by smoothly. I did not suffer from that downward spike that lunch usually produces. I left work with plenty of energy and a Broken Bells whistle (which they played at my work). Coincidentally the person who is pro-Kombucha also introduced me to Broken Bells. Strangely compelling…

Overall as Tony the Tiger says, ::crickets chirping:: Tony the Tigers dead. He is not saying anything. I will attest to the value of kombucha. Good product. I may be investing more into it in the near future.

On a sidenote:

I feel like there is not enough funny material in this post. Here, this should help.

Not helping? Can’t say I did not try. You could say that I did not try hard enough, but shh…on that one.

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About Titillating Thoughts

I am called Kenny. I respond to it. I am twenty-three years of age. This blog will represent my unique way of looking at life. It is to be a collection of thoughts that titillate your brain flaps. I am not always politically correct, but it all comes from a comedic nature. I hope you enjoy my dry and sarcastic humor.

Posted on June 4, 2012, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 11 Comments.

  1. Never heard of that drink before. Is it just in health food stores?

  2. Kombutcha…must look out for it! I could do with something to get rid of that afternoon must-snooze feeling.

  3. Does it actually have alcohol in it, or is it just supposed to give you a surge of feel good because it is so “healthy”?

    • Well its fermented. So it reads on the back of the bottle: Due to the natural fermentation, the product may contain a trace amount of alcohol. There is one that you have to be 21+ to buy. Really, it is less than 1%. So it’s not really doing anything. Maybe super health oriented people never drink, so 1% is monumental? I don’t know…lol

  4. If you really want to stay young don’t give birth. Kids splitting open your vagina is a surefire way for crow’s feet under your eyes.

  5. Sounds like a viable alternative to crack. They probably don’t sell it in the UK.

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