Craigslist is ADmusing

I mentioned in a previous blog about the space I had recently acquired in my living vicinity. I posed the question of what I could do with it. I did not disclose that more space equates to more rent. Due to the newly implemented demands, I have cast focus onto available apartments in my area. This required dusting off my abode-hunting skills and applying them to the wonderful world of Craigslist. The majority of us have acquainted ourselves with Craigslist in one way or another, I am sure. Yet, I never cease to be amused by the ads I find posted in the list that Craig supplies.

When I search Craigslist, I am not searching through the personal avenues for sexual favors. I am just looking in the housing section for rooms and apartments. Still, I find men posting ads inquiring about females who would would like to be a live-in girlfriend, housewife, and sexual deviant. These are not rare entries. These ads are daily occurrences in the housing section of Craigslist.

The real question is: Who answers these ads?

Recently I was conversing with a friend. We discussed my living situation and the various ways I was searching for a new place. I shared with her the ads I was finding on Craigslist. When I showed her the one on the left she responded in her British accent (the conversation was conceived through text, but I imagined it in a British accent), “What the F?! She is paying $160 and still has to have sex with the guy? If she is putting out, she should have free rent. His value of vagina is a bit skewed. I’d charge a 10000 dollars for one time!”

I found myself trying to defend the man and the male population. Penis has value too, okay? What if he is worth the price of admission?

Then I remembered who I was arguing for. While the core of argument is worth debating, the person I chose to make the stand for is not. This is a man searching for vagina via the internet. He does not have game. Well, he may have game, and it may start with a “W”, but it is not women.(“W”orld of Warcraft, for those who missed the joke.)

I began to find humor in reading these and would click on ones that looked interesting. Then I found this one. It was titled “Hi I am Otto/Searching for Master.”

Okay, this is outlandish at first, but I think I can explain it. Perhaps it is just a man named Otto, who is striving to live up to his name. Otto, short for ottoman. I see the connection. And it works too. He is short; nobody likes an elevated ottoman. He weighs in at one hundred and eighty pounds; heavy, yes, but provides decent cushion for the heels. I believe he has chosen the correct career. You may not see eye-to-eye with him, but that is because he is a foot stool. He’s does not make eye-contact.

In the end I was able to bypass the rent for sex and was able to find the normal establishments. You know, the ones where you provide monetary funds and in return you are given a place to live. It has led to some ongoing conversations, which may or may not work out. In the mean time, at least I know there is plenty of humorous material to read on Craigslist.

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About Titillating Thoughts

I am called Kenny. I respond to it. I am twenty-three years of age. This blog will represent my unique way of looking at life. It is to be a collection of thoughts that titillate your brain flaps. I am not always politically correct, but it all comes from a comedic nature. I hope you enjoy my dry and sarcastic humor.

Posted on April 26, 2012, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 11 Comments.

  1. What the “f” is the world coming too ?! I meAn like, reallyyyyyy?!!

    Ads posted in search of sex, housewifes, human ottomans,etc. This is just crazy!

  2. Wow people are so nuts they’re scary. Craigs list is like a horror movie.

  3. hhaahahahha wtf this is sooooo sad…..

  4. Don’t girls like to sit around and be treated like princesses? Most of these guys seem normal. Except for the one who wants to be a gay man’s foot stool. Everyone knows gay men never sit.

  5. I once saw a craigslist post that said the following:

    “Merry Christmas (Title)

    Fat man who looks like Santa wants you to sit on his face. Call Rick. 12304252390”

    I was shocked at first, but then I thought about it. I mean, the Santas at the mall want you to sit on their laps and pretend to be the real Santa. This guy is telling you up front that he just looks like Santa and offering a seat upon his face…which is way farther away from his penis.

    *disclaimer: while said events did occur, the opinion and views of the above comment are for humor purposes only. Santa may or may not exist.

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